Clarissa Dalloway and Society

I feel as if Clarissa Dalloway is a very tragic character. I don't know the formal literary definition of "tragic", but she certainly appeals to my sympathetic side, and I feel as if she is not content with her life, even if she tries to convince herself otherwise. This is shown through her relationships with other people.
First, Sally Seton. Clarissa admires Sally a lot (at least young Sally), chiefly because of her free spirit. The reason Clarissa is so attracted to this is because she wishes she could be that way as well, but is too focused on being "successful". I refrain from defining successful, because Hugh Whitbread's success is much different from what Sally considered success 30 years ago. I feel as if Clarissa is held down by what other people think. She puts her own pleasure behind other people viewing her with respect. (A silly idea to me, since how does she know what theyll think?) I think that Clarissa has also managed to convince herself that she does take pleasure in keeping her hair up and being respectable, but deep down, reminisces nostalgically about her time with Sally, wishing that she could be in a relationship like that again--that is, one in which she can let her hair down through someone else.
With Richard Dalloway, that is impossible. He, too, is trapped in the pretentious world of the London upper-class, although he may actually enjoy it (as he is in a position of power and seems to be cut from a different fabric than Clarissa). Clarissa, of course is attracted to him. He represents everything she aspires to be associated with. I won't get into my personal philosophies, but I feel for Clarissa because she doesn't realize that being a snob is not the only way to get respect.
Of course, she does have Hugh as an example. The Admirable Hugh is one of those "perfect humans" with the possible exception of being chubby. When Clarissa sees Hugh, she forgets any doubts she might have had about taking a different path. He is the epitome of respectable. All those in power idolize him; who cares that Peter dislikes him-- the opinions or laypeople hardly matter!
Which bring us to Peter Walsh. The big What If of Clarissa's life. He represents the other path-- the carefree path, living his life for himself, not others. Of course, she looks upon Peter with disdain now, but still imagines an alternate life with him.
My base argument is that Clarissa has very conflicting thoughts deep inside her, and when she was forced to make a final decision, she could not be completely happy with either outcome. For her, the choice was between control over her own life, or having to continually check herself to make sure her actions fit what was "respectable" to the upper class. For this reason, Mrs. Dalloway strikes me as a very tragic character.

Aurelius vs Howie

To me, it seems obvious why Howie is so avaggrated by Aurelius' thoughts regarding mortality--specifically, that life is quite trivial. Howie's reaction, a common expression of emotion from him, is expected because by now we have realized how important life's trivialities are to him. For Howie, trivialities dont exist-- each little observation one makes can be explored in great detail, until it seems as important as a Law of Science or an "eleventh commandment". For Aurelius to imply that life doesn't really matter serves as an attack on Howie's outlook on the world: everything matters.
Of course, no one wants to hear that in the long run, they don't really matter. The statement could spark a serious philosophical debate on the meaning of life, but Howie has a more personal reason to be opposed to Aurelius' writings. No wonder he had stopped reading the last time! Aurelius had just insulted the very things that Howie enjoys the most in his otherwise inconspicuous life.
Without ever actually mentioning these things (namely, those occurences and objects that, when examined in detail, prove both contemplative and impressive), Aurelius manages to offend Howie. By using the word "trivial" he means to say that not much really matters in life. However, Howie approaches the world from a very individual point of view. He doesn't care how the world will remember him, he just loves examining his surroundings for all they are worth. Of course these things matter! Why else would he care so much? Even if no one else cared about the milk carton or whether or not to ask for a bag when buying shoelaces from CVS, they still arent trivial! The very fact that Howie takes these two things seriously makes them quite untrivial, in fact.
For me, the main difference between Howie and Aurelius is how they view the world. While Aurelius attempts to look at life from an outsider's perspective, Howie is very much a part of his world, and his philosophy recognizes this fact by treating everything with importance.